Fear of Mr. Dursley's look alikes...lol

Do psychiatrists have a name for the fear of foreigners? Well, I studied Psychology myself but haven’t heard of that one. Wondering why am I asking? Because I think I have that kind of fear, hehe. No, really, especially the old and huge ones, like Mr. Dursley in Harry Potter (yikes!).

Only few close friends know this but it’s true. I can’t stand being close to them. When I was in Galera (where there are foreigners all around!) I hid from them and had my bes cover me almost all the time we were wandering the bar areas (scary talaga..). He was laughing at me because I was so weird daw. I didn’t enjoy that trip much, and it’s all because of those beasts!!! I couldn’t go out at night and had myself trapped in the room watching blurry cable tv shows...playing card games and scrabbles…now tell me, was that cool?gggrrr….

I am pretty sure that I wasn’t traumatized with foreigners when I was a kid,so no history of it. Maybe it’s just paranoia, yet still weird and yah a bit ridiculous if you would just think about it. Crazy me!

But what I know is that, for a person to get rid of a certain fear, she should be exposed to that thing that she is afraid of (forgot the term.). In my case, I need to deal with people like Mr. Dursley…gosh! This is torture!!!

Another chance...

Pagkakataon

08/19/07

written by: phnas


Pagkakataon and aking hiling
Para simulan muli itong pangarap
Minsang pagsuko’t pagkakamali
Ay kalimutan kasama ng mga ulap

Tiwala sa sarili ang kailangan
Tatag ng loob at pananampalataya
Sipag at tiyaga ang panlaban
Sa hamo’t pagsubok na nakaamba

Panahon na para tumayo sa sariling mga paa

Patunayan sa sarili na kayang-kaya
Tuparin ang ninanais at ikaliligaya
Di dapat sumuko sa isang kisap-mata
Tuloy-tuloy lang hangga’t may pag-asa

Kapag nadapa, tumayo’t magsimula
Nang walang takot at pangamba
Paulit-ulit man at nakakasawa
Magkamali at matuto ang mahalaga

A song for Jess

A Song for Jess
06/20/07
written by: phnas

Tears run down on my face
Hopes run dry in my heart
Nobody seemed to care
Everything seems to turn back on my side
It’s all me myself and thy God!

I whisper His name, my friend, my Father
Helps through these awful times are fading away
Im struggling, weary and troubled
Whom can I turn to? Whom can I call?
It’s all me, myself and thy God!

The world is busy with things it has
People are not contented, dissatisfied
Pre-occupied with gold and glory
Priorities changin, lives are complicated
Whom can I turn to? Whom can I call?
It’s all me, myself and thy God!

Let us be reminded of God’s love
Him, whom we can turn to, whom we can call
In our happiest and toughest times
It’s you, yourself and thy God!

An OLD Question

I am a reading and spelling teacher, I handle special kids with Learning Disabilities. One part of our program is called Oral Language Development (OLD). It aims to develop kids’ ability to express their feelings and views in complete and organized manner because most of them have disarray thoughts. Having this job for more than a year, I could say that I am really getting used to it, that sometimes I am doing it with my friends already, during lunch outs, dinner get-togethers or during even a chit-chat over the phone. It’s a funny feeling when I realize after doing that, that I actually treated my friends as my students. Well, it’s the teacher in me working!

Anyways, let’s go back to the OLD part. If there is one question I would like to ask myself right now, honestly, it would be this: Am I satisfied with my life? (pretty hard huh!). And to tell you the truth, I am not sure what to answer yet.

Admit it. We, human beings naturally don’t feel satisfied easily, especially with life in general. Everyday, we ask more and more things. Our hunger for contentment and happiness is infinite. That sometimes, we don’t know when to stop asking. Sad but true…

I wake up in the morning and ask myself, why my life isn’t changing the way I planned and wanted it? I know I am working hard, but it’s just the fruit of my labor as they call it, that is not in front of me. Why can’t I have it tangibly, now or sooner? Yah, you may ask why am I so raring to go for it. I don’t know, maybe I compete with time, with age. I want to achieve so many things with my life, with so little time and if I will be stacked to this kind of living for quite a long while, things that I want to do would be narrowed down. And at the end, I know I would still feel unsatisfied.

God has plans for me. I am sure of that and whatever they are, I believe that they will really make me truly happy, that those plans will serve my purpose here. I am trying to lift everything to Him and trust Him with my life, with everything I do. I still fail, many times, but I know I am learning. It’s a good start. J

So, did I nail the OLD question, well obviously not, but I am hopeful that soon, very soon, God will make me realize how to best answer that it.