why can't some people grow up???
i mean (when maturity becomes directly proportional to their ages)
just so sad.... :(

My Best Coping Mechanisms of All Time

1. when someone irritates me

smile lang and pretend that person doesn’t exist, I take it as a challenge

2. when I am getting frustrated with what im doing

stop for a while, breathe and then start again

3. when someone is so madaldal and it’ll be rude to let her/ him stop

nod lang ng nod and pretend I am all ears

4. when I feel so lazy

I hibernate (no text, no call, in short I don’t exist!)

5. when I’m feeling so stressed out

I take vitamins and stress tabs!

6. when I don’t feel like talking

I hide! (weirdo!)

7. when I have no time to make lesson plans

recycle the previous LPs! Hehe

8. when I feel that my mind is so active

I write down my ideas kahit sobrang mapuyat ako

9. when I feel like giving up

I give myself a break or treat myself (basketball is my therapy)

10. when napikon ko si kuya ko

maghahain ako ng lunch at dinner niya! At magpapaalila…huhuhu…it works!

11. when I can’t concentrate and pray

I keep quiet pero nakakatulog ako…bad….tsktsk

12. When someone is getting on my nerves

mas nagiging patient ako…naks!

13. when I miss my bes

I view his profile or text him I miss him

14. when i'm stock in traffic

haaay…the best time to daydream!!!

15. when I feel like crying because madrama ang palabas

I go to my room and then cry

16. when I feel like crying

I cry a lot, burry my head under the pillow and then cry until I get tired and fall asleep

17. when I need to review for a major exam or finish reports

I sleep at daytime and work during madaling araw

18. when I can’t hide my kilig

I giggle in silence…ahihi

19. when I can’t resist eating a lot especially pag may seafood

haaay… drink a lot of water..then I’ll feel bloated and then mahihiya na akong kumain pa ng mas madami.

20. when my insomnia strikes me

dvd marathon of my favorite tv series…..

To be continued…. this is fun.... :)

A Mass for the Sumilao Farmers

The 7^th night of simbang gabi in Ateneo was held for the Sumilao farmers of Bukidnon. I was so lucky to be there and witness it. I was with Ketsy and 4 other community members who also attended the mass in lieu of our Friday night Prayer meeting.

That was such an experience for me. Ironically, I felt awesome to set foot on Ateneo and be part of the Atenean community for just few hours. The people, the mass, the environment were surreal. I once dreamt to feel that feeling and it came true at that moment.

Anyways, the Sumilao farmers walked from Bukidnon to Manila to fight for their right to have the 400 hundred hectares of farm land which is now being run by an international company. They walked 1,800 kilometers on foot just for the government to take notice of them and actually hear them.

The mass was held in Ateneo because the study was started by a group of students from the said school. The Jesuit priests are supporting them in this fight for right not only for the farmers themselves but also for the future of their families.

The homily given by Father Weng, the head of the Jesuit community in the Philippines, told the people why one of the farmers was convinced to take part in this battle. That farmer’s reason was that when he saw his nine-month old son, he knew that he needed to do this for his kid’s better future. That was really touching that made me cry. That was a realization for me that these things happen in real lives. That battle can be won with love and support. At that moment, I felt that my spirit was with them. That was really moving!

The mass’s collection was offered to the farmers as well as the sales coming from the statement shirts being sold by the students. I am really grateful that even in prayers and in my simple ways, that I was able to be a part of their battle. I really hope that the government will hand them their land.

My family isn’t the typical one. I live with my mom and my one brother. I have two other half brothers that stay with my dad in Manila. Since I was born it’s my Kuya Thobby I was with. We grew up together under one roof and under the care of our mama alone.

This holiday season will be a more special one not because we’re gonna celebrate it in a different way but it will be a thanksgiving celebration in a way because most of this year has been hale and hearty year as far as my brother’s health is concern.

The start of 2007 was ghastly for us, me and my brother spent the New Year in the hospital for the first time away from our mama, lola, 2 cousins and tita amy. He was in and out of the hospital because he was diagnosed to have vasculitis, an auto immune disease caused by hepatitis and stress according to the doctor. That was the longest time we were together and the first time I actually took care of him. During that time, I couldn’t help but think of the possibilities that anything could happen because his state was pretty serious and anytime I could lose him. I was really afraid then and couldn’t imagine how my life would be if that dreadful thing would happen.

It’s hard to illustrate how am I with my brother, maybe this letter would explain it.

A letter from my Kuya Thobby, dated July 13, 2005

A pleasant day to you my wicked sister. What can I say? Well, I know, we’ve been into rough and smooth times, and I know we don’t have the typical brother and sister thing just like other common people. Although we share things and we bond sometimes especially if I have topak… but this doesn’t mean we don’t have a good relationship right?

It is just that, we seldom see each other and we seldom have the opportunity. We were brought up as survivors and independents, that’s why very often we rely to one another. We are very secretive and insensitive sometimes.

But that’s what we are and its hard to change it now. On the other hand I’m grateful that you become what Mama wanted you to be and I’m proud that you have grown fat (hehe) joke! I mean you have grown to a fine and responsible Viva Hot Mama! No kidding!

I thank you for being there with me especially when I needed you most, you may not know it but honestly I really appreciated those small things.

I wish you all the best in your career and I pray that you’ll be happy and contented in life. I am always here if you need me, juts don’t hesitate especially if it’s a serious thing. I am also facing a hard time this past few days and I’m trying to overcome it.

One thing I’ve learned in life is that, things just come and go without premises, things change and things sometimes turn to be unfair, but no matter what happens at the end it is still you who need to decide and choose for your own fate. I hope you will choose the right thing.

What more can I say?

Thanks for being my one and only Candy.

God Bless.

I love you!

Gwapong Kuya Thobby

I feel bad...
I planned that i would try to complete simbang gabi this year....
But it turned out that i needed to stay in ALabang until the 20th...
I could have attended mass in a nearer church there...
But i don't know the place that much and not familiar with it...
Iba pa din pag sa San Mateo ako mag simbang gabi...

Sayang talaga...
:(

Things to do during the Christmas Break

8 Progress Reports

10 Remedial Plans

(akala ko ba BREAK???gggrrrrr)

Finish a Clique Series book (thanks Andy!!!)

Write more songs and articles on my blog (yippee!)

Try to exercise and go to the gym (haay life!)

Sleeeeeep…. (this is life!)

Reunion in Batangas (sana matuloy!)

Costume Party in Living Hope (Who will I be???)

Go and visit my daddy and kuyas (tampo na sila sa akin talaga!)

Meet with Anapot! And have some girl bonding activity… (Nail Spa sounds good!)

WATCH PBA GAMES!!!! (alleluya! finally!)

Experiencing Avenue Q

RCBC Plaza,Carlos P. Romulo Auditorium that could sit more or less 300 people at 8 pm last night. I was with Den, Sara, Les, Esh and Migen. One of the last gimmicks among wordlab barkada before the year ends. We were on the 2^nd row front seat like 5 feet from the stage, was this the best seat ever or what!!!. Aiza Seguerra, Rachel Alejandro, Joel Trinidad, were some of the actors who performed. It was directed by Carlos Garcia and lasted for almost 1 ½ hours. And I enjoyed it very very very much! Though some parts are rated PG!hehe… you know…

My brother loves theater, that’s his passion. He used to act at UP and CCP, and now directs plays and leads a theatrical group here in San Mateo. I watched him be a taong grasa and portrayed other characters.

I didn’t know I would love theater too. I appreciate it a lot! Maybe runs in the blood, pero ako more on nag-aapreciate lang. I can’t act. I am a boring actor, ang happy and sad expression halos pareho lang. hehe. I won’t pass any audition.

Well, mabibilang pa din with my hands how many plays I’ve seen and next year I plan to save more money para makapanood ako ng iba pang broadway plays.

Next target: Cinderella!!!! (soooooo excited)

Knowing HIM through Living Hope

Being in Wordlab School is indeed a blessing in disguise because it served as an avenue for me to be involved in a Christian community, where I know has been changing my life a lot spiritually and as a person.

I really wanted to share this part of me here in my blog but I was concerned at first, well until now, if I could tell you its story in the way it’s supposed to be told and give it the proper justice it should have. Well, no harm in trying!

My History in this Community

Alvin, a good friend, whom I met during a DAYS retreat back in my senior year in college was the one who invited me to attend a Friday meeting in Rockwell, of course my first reaction was “I am busy and I have plans this Friday na, sorry”. But that was a lie (hehe), because I assumed that oh no this would be another community who does things in exaggerated ways, the way I see it on television. So the second time and the third time….still, no thank you! Maybe next time ang drama ko. But he was so persistent in inviting me, to the point na he was discussing already the mission and vision and the things they do there. Oh my! Did he just give me a lecture? Hehe, so sige na nga, let’s give it a try. And besides nakijoin force ang one of the big bosses ng school in inviting me, so as a good employee, and I was newly hired then in the school, I could say na medyo napilitan ako… (love you ketsy!)

I was shocked how warm the welcome I received from the people in this community. These people whom I met like few minutes before lang that same night. Diba sometimes, you would just be comfortable with a person kahit you don’t know the reason at all. That’s what happened to me. Maybe, it was their genuine smile and appreciation that I took time on a gimik Friday night to see what they do for God.

The First Friday Prayer Meeting

There was the introduction part, saying Hi! to everyone and eating a snack while waiting for other members to arrive and for the prayer meeting to start. Past 8pm, we went up to the room where they hold it, there was some kinda band stuff being set up, I was hearing beautiful voices and hearing the good, holy music. I like that! Then, it began.

Five charismatic songs were sung. The lyrics were being shown on the projector so sing along lang ako, and in fairness, ganda ng songs. Parang I can relate ang reaction ko. After the last set of song, there was this part na, ay tapos na! Tapos, Ketsy whispered something like, “don’t be surprised ah”. OK what does that mean? And then I heard let’s give love to everyone! And then people started walking from one row to another and started hugging and kissing each other on the cheeks, as in all! Male or female!So na shock ako! I don’t know them! It’s really awkward to do that, but they were the one who approached me and welcomed me in that gesture! Well, it ended up naman na di ako masyado na ilang because I just had beso beso with the girls. The men were gentlemen talaga so hand shake lang.

After that, there was a short talk about a certain topic and bible verses were read. And after that was sharing part where people go infront and talk about the blessing they have received and how God is blessing them Basically, any topic can be opened up dun. Makukulit ang mga tao! As in! makulit na cool!

I felt really welcomed, so since then I started attending. After two months, I had a retreat and commit myself to be a member. My only duty then was to attend Friday prayer meetings on a regular basis. Then nagging disciple na ako and then servant. Galing!

Now, one year and four months na ako! Yey! Congrats to me! And endless years to come pa!

HE is our GOD…

I am loving God now the way I never imagined I could. I am not a so religious person who’s good in everything and to everybody. I’m still a human being who could not resist temptations and sin a countless time. Pero the big difference now is that I have a God whom I know is there for me and who will take care of me. Life becomes so much easier with Him in my heart. Trials become so petty sometimes because of that trust to His promise na everything will be alright. I have someone to whom I can lift up all my burdens and worries in life. I have a daddy and a friend whom I can share all things about me. I feel safe all the time wherever I am and wherever my loved ones are. My life is ok with Him and I am happy because of Him and his love for me.

Now, I want to be able to give to HIM all in me..to be able to fully trust Him with my life and to worship Him everyday of my life. I want to worship him and sing songs for Him all the time. I am so much amazed and thankful that He is my God!

The enchanted-pig-out date

First day of December, I just had five students in 8 hours straight! An impulsive movie invitation from an ADHD teacher was such a great plan. At 4:30 we started packing and preparing for a wonderful girl-to-girl bonding ahead! Oh my! What a way to end an arduous day indeed!

On the way to Alabang Town Center, more or less a 20-minute walk from the office, beepsie and I had a good chit-chat. At first, to be honest I had apprehensions if I could jive with her flamboyant personality because that’s not exactly me, but the more times I spend with her, the more I realize that she could be a really good companion. And ironically I feel really comfortable with her.

We talked about her life, her annulment, her husband, their adopted child and how she copes with everything that’s going on with her. It’s just amazing that despite this difficult time, she still manage to laugh and be genuinely happy. Bow ako sa kanya dun talaga. I may not really know her but I pray na sana, she’ll be okay, especially inside.

Anyways, the walk was marvelous, the December cozy weather was fantastic as well! We bought tickets the moment we arrived and had Quickly (oh so yummy! With extra nago!) and some chips and chocolate (for her lang! really tempted but no!). Oh and yes, I also saw Ryan Agoncillo in the Candy Shop (ok not so papable! Dedma lang…hehe).

The movie we saw was Enchanted… and in fairness the movie house was packed, as in standing room. Before it started, I couldn’t take my eyes away from the popcorn man, Well I was not staring at the man who was selling popcorn but to the stuffed pop corn bags he was holding. Syempre di ako nakatiis and told beepsie, “im so sorry but I need to buy those popcorns”, my EQ is really low talaga when it comes to pagkain… and guess what? I was surprised when I found out that she was thinking of the same thing too! Wahaha! So we ended up buying two pop corn bags with different flavors, white cheese and barbeque (yum!yum!yum!). Ok, that was heaven! As in! Sabi ko nga sa kanya if every weekend would be like that, hay naku I’ll be really super duper happy talaga!

I don’t want to talk about the movie, not because I didn’t like it, but because I don’t know how to make a sort of a movie review. Basta all I know is that the best part of it is Patrick Dempsey…a.k.a McDreamy! And while watching the movie, parang I had a right to daydream na naman….haay…

There’s one line that he said that made me sad lang that: “Fairy tales and they live happily ever after don’t happen in real life”.

Sana di yun totoo kasi I believe in that and I always wonder what my fairy tale story would be.